The Japanophile's Contradiction
In Japan, there's a saying that goes 「郷に入れば、郷に従え」（ごうにいれば、ごうにしたがえ・gou ni ireba, gou ni shitagae) which means much the same as "When in Rome..."; when you're in a place, you should follow the rules/customs of that place. Sometimes this basic tenet works, sometimes it doesn't. For example, I wouldn't expect a Japanese tourist in England to memorise useless football statistics, scream down their mobile phones on trains and vomit profusely in public places. Someone from a country that has a very strong sense of public harmony and etiquette shouldn't be expected to abandon it just because they're in a different country where those same customs don't happen to pertain. Being a little too quiet or reserved in a country where everyone speaks their mind is hardly a faux pas.
However, reverse the situation and it is an obvious problem. I only speak from experience, so I'm not singling any one nation out, but Americans and Brits in Japan do suffer from this exact predicament. We're loud, disruptive, and... let's face it... annoying, which doesn't help in a country where social harmony is a goal. I used to think the occasional concerned glance I got from Japanese people was something bordering on racism, but now when I see a gaijin (foreigner) on a train or in the street, I feel myself becoming more and more inclined to do the same. When Japanese people on trains gradually shuffle away from me, rather than feeling offended, I find myself thinking "Good on you. If I were on a train next to someone from a country whose people continually and reliably fuck everything up with a level of noise usually bequeathed to a war, I'd move away too." And so I too am now a 人種差別する人。 I also distinguish between people based entirely on their nationality. Like the Japanese ideas of 内 and 外 I'm gradually coming to think of foreigners with an "us or them" attitude.
A factor that plays a big part in this problem is that Japan is continually under seige at the hands of "Japanophiles", who come here in their hundreds of thousands; Japanophiles who fail to grasp one simple, yet crucial, truth: they don't actually like Japan. These poor, decibellic, deluded tourists come here thinking they love Japan, yet this could not be further from the truth. Confused? Not as much as I am. To understand further, one needs to understand wherein a country's cultural identity lies, and it is here that we can see a big distinction between Japan and the West ("us and them" again... sorry!)
To make a broad, and horrifically sweeping generalisation (although a true one in my opinion), America and Britain's cultural identity are based on "things"; stuff; something that can be produced. When one thinks of America, immediately McDonald's golden arches come into mind. Big cars, big asses, big bucks, "This Bud's for you", Starbucks, Wall Street, Marlborough, guns, FOX News, Hollywood movies, and big budget, movie-like dramas. America's culture is undeniably tied into these material things. I doubt, when conjuring up images of the US, one thinks of "The Way of the American". You don't think of how an American enters their home, or how they eat. You only think of what they eat. Sure, if you're new to knives and forks, you'd consider it, but you wouldn't tie that image in to what-it-means-to-be-a-Westerner.
Undoubtedly there is an American/British way of life with many subtle nuances, as does any country. We are loud, speak our minds when we want to, and express ourselves. But that's not so much a "way of life" so much as saying "any way is good", which is another way of saying we have no "way" as such. You might disagree and think that complete freedom is a way of life, but that's equivalent to saying that having no traffic laws is, in itself, a kind of traffic law... which it obviously isn't. Anyway, I digress.
My point is, in the West we've come to identify our countries' cultures through what they've produced. Somehow "The Office" (the original, better one!) is quintessentially British. James Bond is apparently quintessentially British, despite the fact I've never met any Brit like him. Tea is British, Starbucks is American. English gentleman, American Cowboy. These are all images, they're all things.
And so, to come back to my point, when us foreigners see Manga (Japanese comics) or Anime (animated movies), or when we hear J-Pop, or see the funky pictures of girls in Harajuku dressed like an Alice in Wonderland character after dropping acid, many of us think "Wow, Japan is cool. I like Japan." But the fact is, you don't. You've only scratched the materialistic and very superficial tip of what you'll soon discover is a massive ice berg made out of social etiquette, protocol, and harmony.
American and British culture is so heavily interwoven with its output of stuff, that we mistakenly identify Japan with its equivalents; sushi, Manga, Anime, crazy fashion, karaoke, and so on. But no sooner than we get off the plane do we realise that, for some reason, we're annoying the natives, getting weird looks when all we're doing is listening to our iPod on the train, and generally pissing everyone off. That's because, ladies and gentlemen, Japan's identity lies in its people, and the way they live. That is Japan. I'm sorry if you've come all the way from the UK, or The United States because you've somehow deluded yourself into thinking that Japan is your spiritual home just because you happen to like "Dragonball". If you love comics, fashion and J-Pop, but you don't like bending over backwards to keep everyone around you content, then I'm sorry, but you actually don't like Japan, because the latter is far more important. The latter is Japan.
In my short time here, I've met a lot of gaijin who profess their utter love for Japan. They're convinced that they somehow belong here, just because they wear strange clothes and like fucked up pop music. And yet they then get completely confused by something as simple as... being expected to follow a rule, and don't understand why the Japanese people deride them for it. "But I'm wearing a pink tie, a purple velvet hat, and I can quote every line from any Naruto comic. Why are they pissed off at me?" Why? Because you can't blend in, maintain harmony, keep those around you happy, avoid creating an unnecessary scene. You can't do any of these things because you don't like doing them. You... don't like Japan.
If you're serious about Japan, then you need to be serious about its people and the every day way of life, and how they do things. Coming to Japan, ecsatic that you're somehow "finding yourself" just because you like a few anime series and Mr. Children, is the same as moving your life to L.A. because you liked the drama series "24". Completely ridiculous isn't it?
If you really love Manga, Anime, mismatching clothes, and ramen, then just stay in your country, get a Japanese take away, dress up, whack on "Full Metal Alchemist" and then have a massive otaku circle jerk with you and your friends. Problem solved - you get to remain convinced that you somehow love Japanese culture without being hideously disappointed by the experience of coming here and realising how comepletely clueless you were, and Japan doesn't have to put up with you... being you.
